


Just a Dream

by Theamazingfandomunicorn



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Carrie Underwood - Freeform, Just A Dream, M/M, Sad Ending, Song fic, more tags to come, spirk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-21 15:20:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9554798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theamazingfandomunicorn/pseuds/Theamazingfandomunicorn
Summary: Spirk song!fic based on Just a Dream by Carrie Underwood.





	

_Baby why'd you leave me?_

 

Jim casually turned round and shot a smug smirk in Spock's direction. Spock quickly inhaled, whenever he saw Jim's smile he melted like a wax candle, his breath hitched. This wasn't logical, none of this. Jim made Spock's head whirl. The way the edges of his mouth crease when he grins. The way his eyes sparkled when he laughed, which was a lot. The way he could open his mouth and light up a room. The way his lips tasted of vanilla, comforting. The way his smooth voice could simultaneously calm and infatuate Spock and his warring two halves. He was the stars, he ignited Spock's burnt out stars. He was the moon, he rekindled Spock's darkened moon. He was the planets, he organised Spock's chaotic planets. He was the galaxy, he filled the missing piece in Spock's fractured galaxy. And, though he knew that everything would be fine. He was a worrier, though he rarely showed it, he was. He still didn't want to Jim to go and risk his life for a cause he had already dedicated so much to. No matter how worthy it was. No matter how many times it had ended fine. No matter how much courage Jim had. No matter how hard Spock tried to suppress his torrid waves of emotions. He just wanted Jim to come back. Never wanted him to leave. Never wanted him to risk his life, his anything, himself. Just wanted Jim to always be with him. It was selfish he knew, but...

 

"Don't worry. I'll be fine and come back to you in one piece, like always. I promise." Jim's voice ripped Spock from his thoughts.

"Worrying is a human emotion, Jim." Spock stated, trying hard to sound deadpan and emotionless. But his T'hy'la knew him better than that.

"I promise," Jim reassured him. Jim never breaks his promises.

Jim slowly stepped away from the door to their quarters. He looked into Spock's dark eyes, his hazel ones searching. Peering deeply into Spock's soul, slowly and deliberately destroying every barrier Spock had put in place. It wasn't the first time, and Spock hoped it wasn't the last time. Pressing his two fingers against Spock's, Jim gently placed a butterfly kiss against Spock's lips. Albeit reluctantly, Spock watched him go. Spock would go down later with the Science Team, but for now they would be separated by 350,000 kilometres, 900 miles, 12 metres and 6 centremetres.

"I love you T'hy'la," Spock softly whispered. Scared he was going to lose Jim. Scared he was speaking to him for the last time. Scared of that dreading feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"I love you too T'hy'la." Jim whispered back. The doors opened. Jim walked through. They closed again. Jim was gone.

 

_Why'd you have to go?_

 

The transporter slowly beeped to life as Spock watched his atoms being transported to wherever Jim was, he didn't care. 4 hours 36 minutes and 9 seconds had passed way to slowly for Spock's liking. He soon found himself on a strange desert world, his tricorder was going crazy , he then attempted to use his communicator but all that came out of it was crackling static. Something was very wrong, so very wrong.

"It seems that the dust in the atmosphere has interfered with some of our equipment, Mister Spock." Spock was startled at the sudden voice behind him. He whirled round.

It was Jim.

He let out a sigh of relief and replied "Yes it seems so. I suggest that we find a clear area where our transmissions can reach the ship."

"Yes, I agree. I will lead my command team try to make contact the Enterprise, you should stay here." Jim said.

Spock opened his mouth to protest.

"No. You need to stay here in case the air clears. We need a reliable tricorder reading, we don't know what could be out there. I'll be fine. I promise." Jim never breaks his promises.

"Ok." Spock agreed, he was sure that Jim would be ok, this would all be fine. All of it. Fine.

 _I was counting on forever_  

Then-it happened.

 

A small, red laser beam glowed like a burning iron. Except, the colour behind the beam was pink. Not yellow. It flew through the air, like a whistle. A bullet from a gun. The blast was from a large and clumsy weapon. Suddenly, Spock couldn't hear anything but the small gasps escaping from the lips of the team as their minds predicted the aim of the laser became apparent. At that moment, Spock stood and took in every detail of Jim's face. His wavy golden hair, his pleasantly plump cheeks. His eyes. His chest. His clothes. His red blood seeping from the wound. His everything. Spock's everything gone. Blown out like a candle in the wind. A single dancer in an abandoned grey ballroom once bustling with light, warmth and life. Now desolate and grey.

 

Spock knelt down beside Jim. His entire body shaking, trembling with fear.

 

Jim looked up into his eyes and traced every detail with his. Admiring every part like a drawing, hard and soft lines weaving together like threads in a tapestry. Every moment they had shared together flashed through his eyes. Their first meeting, every secret look, chaste kiss, promises kept, sweet declarations of love, touch of nimble fingers, the bond that tied them together like ribbons.

 

His breath became laboured. Spock felt a pearly tear fall from his right eye, rolled down his cheek and landed on Kirk's.

"I...Love...You," Kirk gasped. He started coughing up blood, that trickled out of the side of his mouth.

"I love you too," Spock replied. He didn't even try to hide his emotions this time. He couldn't hold back the pain tearing his heart in two.

_And now I'll never know_

They had been beamed up just as the last breath in Jim's hollow chest rattled out. 

Jim had been rushed into sickbay for resuscitation. It hadn't worked.

Spock had been relieved of duty whilst he and the crew grieved their loss. He sat down on the large, soft bed they had slept in for years. He looked at the wall they had sat up against and just talked for countless hours. He rested a hand on the bedside table that had once had ancient Terran books Jim had been so fond of.

Spock just couldn't believe it. If it were not for the stinging broken bonds that had once binded them. Snapped in half like fragile twigs. He would have thought it nothing more than a nightmare, that he would soon wake and the man he loved and cherished so dearly would be there beside him. To comfort him. To calm him. To love him.

 

_This can't be happening to me_

__The entire crew stood in silence as the coffin containing the body of the late Captain James Tiberius Kirk was shot out of the hull of the Enterprise. Into vast, starry space.

Spock felt his heart break in two, he kept his face stotic and cold. But he watches his T'hy'la go and fights the urge to run after him, to follow him into the next life. To be with him once more, see his face once again. To hear his voice just once more, to taste his lips for one last time. Just to say goodbye, to have some kind of closure.

In the days that followed, Spock tried to deny it. That Jim was going to be somewhere, alive and well. Like always. That he would be fine. That this would just be a bad dream. All of this, just a dream. 

Spock's galaxy was empty. The stars Jim had lit were all now burnt out. The moon Jim had turned bright and silver was now a cold, desolate grey. The planets Jim had organised into neat rows were now scattered across the universe. The galaxy Jim had repaired was now fractured into shards like a shattered mirror.

This was just a nightmare. Just a dream. Just-

 

_This is just a dream._

Spock awoke with a start.

These dreadful nightmares had been plaguing him for months now. Jim's reassuring scent filled the room like filling a glass with water. He rolled onto his side and held the one thing that could comfort him. Holding it close he breathed in again.

Jim's shirt. The one he had been wearing the day before-before he...

Jim walked slowly around the room, gliding on air. The edge of the bed dipped slightly as he sat down on it and traced the cream-coloured duvet.

Spock rolled back over. Oblivious to his T'hy'la's presence, Jim glowed a supernatural, ghostly blue. The invisibility that comes with being a wandering soul, condemned to an eternity walking the earth from the afterlife. But there was something odd about his soulmate unable to see or hear him. It was almost like a dream.

_This is just a dream._

 

 


End file.
